Ten feet tall and bulletproof

Taliban stragglers -- who recently lost their one-legged commander Mullah Dadullah but still have their one-eyed leader Mullah Omar -- fired rockets in an attempt to whack Afghan President Hamid Karzai as he spoke to villagers in Ghazni province. The rockets were way off the mark -- so much so that Karzai said, "Please sit down. Don't be scared. Nothing is happening."

This makes the third attempt on Karzai's life since the Taliban got the boot in 2001, which still doesn't bring him up to Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf's ever-rising assassination attempt total that stands at at least four since 1999. Pervez has survived driving over a bomb on a bridge, and a pair of suicide car bombers in 2003 only cracked his windshield. Have producers ever considered recasting the next "Rambo" movie? I see sets in Waziristan...