Mugabe prepares for Run Off, or to Run Off?

Although all the election results have yet to be released, it’s clear that Robert Mugabe lost Zimbabwe's presidential election. Of course, since Mugabe has destroyed the economy, looting has become too much like work for an aging dictator. Although Mugabe might seem to be a man that has everything, he finds himself lacking what every smart despot really needs; a good set of luggage. The election results will probably not be released until Mugabe can throw together enough luggage to pack away what little wealth there is left in the country.

Mugabe supporters are not deterred and claim that they are preparing for a runoff. According to the deputy information minister, Bright Matonga, graduate of the Bagdad Bob institute of information, Mugabe’s party only applied 25% of their energy to the campaign and they are going to “unleash” the remaining 75% in the runoff. Translation: Four times as much cheating will be required to keep Mugabe in office.