GOP Vixen

The 25 most emasculated guys

A little Monday morning fluff, courtesy of GQ's "The Whipped List." Their No. 1 most emasculated man? Mr. Madonna, who used to be the man's man director of "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and then got, er, "Swept Away." Plus, as they note, Guy Ritchie is now making a documentary to go with Madonna's Kabbalah fad.

Other funny bits on the list include Rupert Murdoch's arm candy Wendi Dang, who "once asked him in front of colleagues, 'Are you going deaf, old man?'" And on the political front, GQ picks John Edwards:

"After Ann Coulter referred to the former senator and failed presidential candidate as a 'fa---t,' Edwards did the stand-up thing: He let his wife, Elizabeth, call in to Hardball and tell the right-wing harpy off but good. John, meanwhile, looked like a man holding his wife’s purse."

Ah, but in the name of emasculated bipartisanship, Rudy Giuliani also comes in on the list:

"If the former New York mayor is serious about ever running for office again, he should think twice about paying his wife, Judy, a six-figure paycheck for 'writing' speeches she’ll later interrupt with her phone calls."

China bans live Olympic broadcasts from Tiananmen Square

Then how will audiences watch the Tank Run event?

Also from the AP:

"In another sign of the government's unease, 400 American Boy Scouts who had been promised they could go onto the field following a March 15 exhibition game between the Los Angeles Dodgers and San Diego Padres were prevented from doing so by police."

Yeah, Boy Scouts, agents for the Dalai Lama, what's the difference? Keep digging that hole for yourselves, Beijing...

Another deadly sin

The Vatican has updated the seven deadly sins to include polluting the environment and the creepy type of genetic engineering. While they're taking sins high-tech, can they include spammers? You know, the ones that ask if you want your penis to be five inches longer even if you're a woman and have no penis? And you wake up to find 100 such mails in your bulk e-mail folder, as well as the ones that sneak through to your regular folder? Even the ones who pitch replica watches or discount pills -- don't you think you belong in the confessional?? That'll be two Our Fathers, one Hail Mary, and permanently unplugging your computer, spammer!

Eliot Spitzer, another horny politico

So Eliot Spitzer once again confirms what we've all basically known about politicians for ages: they're sleazy. So the New York governor -- er, Client 9 --does his whole mea culpa sphiel about how hooking up with his call girl "Kristen" and being busted in an international prostitution ring has wounded his relationship with his family, blah blah blah blah.

So when are you gonna resign, jackass?

The Filipino inmates are back for Hammer time

5.2 quake makes Brits think it's the Apocalypse

OK, so they don't have temblors very often. But this is L.A., baby, so don't talk to us about Earth shakage. And they have a bunch of stuff made of brick. And "retrofit" likely isn't the first thing on their minds. But there was no serious damage reported and one injury from the U.K. quake that was reportedly felt for 300 miles.

But The Sun tabloid is all over the hot story:

"Stunned Mark Young said he looked out of his window and saw an EIGHT FOOT crack in his neighbour’s garden at LEICESTER.

He said: 'There was a big crack through the ground and there was smoke and flames coming out. It was spitting things out.

'It is eight foot long and two foot wide.'

John Burton feared his house, in WAKEFIELD, West Yorkshire, was going to fall down as he watched television.

He said: 'It shook the whole house.'

Metal worker Simon Smith, 38, from CHATTERIS, Cambs, said: 'It felt like a juggernaut was going down my road.

'I turned to my wife Heather and shouted, "S***, it’s an earthquake."'"

Wimps.

And yes, that's the worst damage picture to be found.

Dubya shakes his groove thang!

That's George with President Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf in Liberia, getting in touch with his inner white boy and just one step away from a full striptease...

What did we say? The tiger was taunted! Someone was high!

Poor Tatiana. Turns out she was goaded to her death by intoxicated young men:

"Sousa's father, Carlos Sousa Sr., said Dhaliwal told him the three stood on a 3-foot-tall metal railing a few feet from the edge of the tiger moat. 'When they got down they heard a noise in the bushes, and the tiger was jumping out of the bushes on him (Paul Dhaliwal),' the documents said.

Police found a partial shoe print that matched Paul Dhaliwal's on top of the railing, Matthews said in the documents.

...The affidavit also cites multiple reports of a group of young men taunting animals at the zoo, the Chronicle reported."

And remember that you saw it here that I had noticed on Sousa's MySpace profile that he had last logged in on Christmas -- the day of the attack -- and described his mood as "high." Now we learn:

"Toxicology results for Dhaliwal showed that his blood alcohol level was 0.16 — twice the legal limit for driving, according to the affidavit. His 24-year-old brother, Kulbir, and Sousa also had alcohol in their blood but within the legal limit, Matthews wrote.

All three also had marijuana in their systems, Matthews said. Kulbir Dhaliwal told police that the three had smoked pot and each had 'a couple shots of vodka' before leaving San Jose for the zoo on Christmas Day, the affidavit said.

Police found a small amount of marijuana in Kulbir Dhaliwal's 2002 BMW, which the victims rode to the zoo, as well as a partially filled bottle of vodka, according to court documents."

Mark Geragos, who's been insisting that there was no taunting involved as dollar signs cha-ching before his eyes, predictably had no comment.

Snow in Baghdad!

For the first time since anyone there can remember, according to AccuWeather! Which makes for a perfect Feel-Good Photo Friday...

Victims may have taunted Tatiana the tiger

From the San Francisco Chronicle comes this on the zoo tiger attack:

"San Francisco police are investigating the possibility that one of the victims in the fatal tiger mauling on Christmas Day climbed over a waist-high fence and then dangled a leg or other body part over the edge of a moat that kept the big cat away from the public, sources close to the investigation said Wednesday.

The minimal evidence found at the scene included a shoe and blood in an area between the gate and the edge of the 25- to 30-foot-wide moat, raising questions about what role, if any, the victims might have had in accidentally helping the animal escape.

The three victims, all young men from San Jose, were visiting the zoo together. They were all present just outside the tiger's grotto when the tiger escaped, killed 17-year-old Carlos Sousa Jr. with a savage slash to the throat, and injured the other two. The names of the survivors, who are brothers ages 19 and 23, have not been released.

The injured victims fled, leaving a trail of blood, which police believe the tiger followed for 300 yards up a zoo pathway. As the tiger cornered and attacked one of the brothers, four police officers arrived, distracted the animal and shot it dead.

...Police sources said a footprint had been found on a metal fence, suggesting that someone had climbed the fence to get closer to the big cats. Authorities were looking into whether the tiger escaped by latching on to a leg or body part.

Zoo director Manuel Mollinedo said it was also likely that the animal was provoked.

'Somebody created a situation that really agitated her and gave her some sort of a method to break out,' Mollinedo said. 'There is no possible way the cat could have made it out of there in a single leap. I would surmise that there was help.

'A couple of feet dangling over the edge could possibly have done it.'

Sources said pinecones and sticks that were found in the moat might have been thrown at the animal. Those items could not have landed in the grotto naturally, they said.

However, police Sgt. Neville Gittens maintained that there was no reason to think that the victims were taunting the tiger."

Oh please. There seems to be plenty of reasons to believe the tiger was taunted. The police are being way too PC. On his MySpace page, Sousa last logged in on Christmas, and listed his mood as "high." It remains to be seen if the guy whose goal was to "partyharder than a rock star" was being literal -- San Fran authorities are conducting an autopsy, as well as a necropsy on Tatiana.

If this is a case of the tiger being taunted, and of a guy climbing over into the enclosure, I hope the city of San Fran does not settle and fights any family lawsuit in court. If the tiger was taunted and lured out of the cage, I would say that the guys would be responsible for this beautiful, endangered cat.