President George W. Bush to Tony Blair at the G-8 summit:
"See the irony is that what they need to do is get Syria to get Hezbollah to stop doing this shit and it's over."
Need I really say more??
(And stop balking, people... that word is in the dictionary)
Italian soccer player Marco Materazzi, on his verbal exchange with French player Zinedine Zidane, after which Zidane head-butted him at the World Cup final:
"I did not call him a terrorist. I am not a cultured person and I don't even know what an Islamist terrorist is."
Dude. That's playing it a little too dumb. Even uncultured twits know what a terrorist is.
Best quote of the day:
"Surrendering today means inviting more extortion." -- Ehud Olmert
Funniest quote of the day:
"President Mubarak spoke personally to Syrian President Bashar Assad and suggested he apply pressure on Hamas to agree to the proposal." -- Palestinian sources
Gag-me quote of the day:
"We are declaring to the public our just and humanitarian demands." -- the terrorist coalition holding the Israeli hostage
British Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott, at a Downing Street meeting with Al Gore:
"I know you didn't win the election Al, and by God, I can tell you I'm sorry about that. Because if you had've done, you can be sure we would have had a totally different type of leadership in the US to the one we have today. Totally different and so much better. I had better not say any more in case these remarks get into the papers."
"Legal council for Heather Mills McCartney said that the tabloids didn't have a leg to stand on when accusing the former model of prostitution."
Incidentally, whenever I've heard someone bring up Mills' German porn shoot over the past week, someone always asks, "Was that before or after she lost her leg?"
And the latest charges? The tabs allege she was a call girl for an arms dealer and the Saudi royal family. Perhaps they should rewrite a part for her into "Casino Royale."
A classic -- in advance of tomorrow's World Cup match between Serbia & Montenegro and Holland -- from Michael Caine as Nigel Powers in "Austin Powers in Goldmember" (one of my favorite all-time movie quotes):
"There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch."
Personally, I think the Dutch should lose simply for torturing us with Joran van der Sloot...
Jason LeTeff, resident of Hell, Mich.:
"Now, here I am living in Hell, taking my kids to church and trying to teach them the right things and the town where we live is having a 6-6-6 party."
Just read the story.
And yes, in the photo, Hell froze over.
Eli Moyal, mayor of Sderot, Israel, after rockets were lobbed at his town from the Gaza Strip without casualties:
"Our luck is that the Palestinians don't know how to aim precisely."
Ice Cube puts the smackdown on Oprah for not putting hip-hopsters on her show:
"She's had damn rapists, child molesters and lying authors on her show. And if I'm not a rags-to-riches story for her, who is?"
Round One goes to da Cube!
Prince Philip, looking forward to the London Olympics in 2012:
"Opening and closing ceremonies ought to be banned. Absolute bloody nuisances. I have been to one that was absolutely appallingly awful."
He is so right. March the athletes out, let them wave and set off some fireworks. Ditch the gaudy, Cirqe de Soleil wannabe show!
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Change is good
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